16. Extravagant cakes
Whilst they’re unlikely to ever get truly, fully eaten and remain in a tin for Christmas, wedding cakes are so increasingly extravagant, the appearance of the fake wax couple at the top are starting to resemble Greek Gods.
17. Inept DJs
“Let the music do the talking” is an approach rarely heard of by most top weddings DJs, each keen to take to the mic and call out any particularly dodgy shapeshifting, and of course, keep us informed of which cars outside have some parked in front of an ambulance.
18. Signing the registry book
The registry book represents one of the few challenges for the lucky, free-loading guest. We would simply advise to speak with heart and sincerity, but that’s still intimidating, knowing ink is there like you know, forever.
19. ‘The Escape Car’
The odd act of letting the driving public know they’re in the presence of a recently hitched couple, with a spot of classic car vandalism.
There are not enough opportunities for organists to play their frankly, often terrifying, music nowadays. So at least until Dizzee Rascal samples one through to the mainstream, weddings remain one of the few opportunities for organists to pipe up. Well, except funerals of course.